The photo below did happen to me thanks to Paul. He said he knew he couldn’t go too overboard since I will be planing his party in 3 months. He is very right and should be very afraid. Should I dress him in drag? Heels, dress, wig?

I work at UPS so I package and ship a lot of boxes everyday. I decided to write a series of posts to help people pack and ship better…because most people don’t have a clue. Today I am talking about “The Giant Magic Cloud Theory” that most people seem to believe.

The Giant Magic Cloud Theory is a theory of how people think their package is handled. They believe their package is picked up by a magic cloud or pillow and it rides on that cloud all he way to the front door of the place they are sending it. The cloud then rests on the doormat with your package perfectly sitting on top of it.

This is not how a package is delivered!!!

When your package leaves The UPS Store it’s hand loaded onto a truck which is driven miles and miles all over town and eventually to a UPS hub or depot. It’s then unloaded by hand and onto a system of conveyor belts. From there if it’s going GROUND (which most packages are) it’s loaded onto a large semi truck.

From the semi truck it could end up on a train or in another truck headed across the country to a central warehouse. Across the country over bumpy highways and roads. Then unloaded in a central warehouse where it could spend an hour going several miles across conveyor belts before being loaded onto another semi truck. Again all loaded by hand.

From that truck your package will be unloaded at another hub or depot, put on belts across the hub, and reloaded onto a delivery truck to get delivered to where ever it’s going.

The whole time your package is on these trucks and trains it’s stacked. It could be in a stack 8 feet high and it could be at the very bottom of the stack. You could write “fragile” or “do not bend, break, or stack” all over the box…those are all nice things to write on the outside of a box for decoration…but they mean nothing.

Your package would cost 10 times as much to ship if you didn’t want it stacked or didn’t want computer guided conveyor belts to toss it around whichever way it wants.

This doesn’t mean your package will end up looking like the one below. It just means you need to pack it properly. I will talk about that next week.

Ideation: People who are especially talented in the Ideation theme are fascinated by ideas. They are able to find connections between seemingly disparate phenomena.

Relator: People who are especially talented in the Relator theme enjoy close relationships with others. They find deep satisfaction in working hard with friends to achieve a goal.

Individualization: People who are especially talented in the Individualization theme are intrigued with the unique qualities of each person. They have a gift for figuring out how people who are different can work together productively.

Responsibility: People who are especially talented in the Responsibility theme takes psychological ownership of what they say they will do. They are committed to stable values such as honesty and loyalty.

Arranger: People who are especially talented in the Arranger theme can organize, but they also have a flexibility that complements this ability. They like to figure out how all of the pieces and resources can be arranged for maximum productivity.

Have you taken the Strengths Finder test? What are your top 5?

Do people really use a “bachelor party planning company” to plan bachelor parties? Maybe if you want a party like The Hangover you would, but I don’t.

I expect three B’s tonight at my Bachelor Party tonight.

1. My best buds
2. Good beer
3. Some baseball

I also semi expect my best man Paul to make me wear a shirt or hat that says “princess” on it, but I am not looking forward to that.

What did you do for your bachelor or bachelorette party?

President Obama has “come out” and said he is for gay marriage. Obama’s competition, Mitt Romney, said that he is still for marriage between a man and a woman.

So here’s the question. Listen carefully and answer properly. Or don’t answer at all and just think about it. Do you think this one issue will decide the upcoming election? Yes or No? Will America vote for our next President based on if they are for or against gay marriage?

It went from a debate that wasn’t really even talking about my question “is that an issue” why or why not, to a foul language and name calling fiasco. Name calling or women, from boys, trying to act tough, is not ok.

So congratulations on failing to have a civil debate. Congratulations on making one good point only to have it thrown out the window after talking down to and calling women names to try and make your insecure self feel better. Congratulations on being a boy who can shave but not act like a man. It’s time to grow up.

Dear Boys, I don’t care who you are, where you stand in your political or religious views, or what you think is an issue or not. If I wanted to babysit adults, I would become a cop in San Ramon or Pleasanton. But I don’t want to, not even a little. So start working on treating women with some respect and maybe you will earn some respect from others around you. It’s time to grow up. Feel free to call me when you are ready to start. I want to help you out.

Chris

At 7:15am today he is having surgery at Stanford. Stanford is the only place in Northern California that treats his type of cancer. Any prayers are much appreciated.

Here’s a picture of my dad visiting me at work and me acting like an adult.